Saturday, April 16, 2005

the great game
by iggy

it's 4am and i am cooking chicken on the barbeque. why does it feel weird to use the bbq in the middle of the night? using the stove at night is normal. somehow the bbq isnt...

but maybe its not the bbq that is making me feel weird right now and its the game i just finished. tonight was the second friday of the month so we all met up to play "diplomacy" at leo's house. randy had invited some of those SCA guys to game night again, so we were going to do game night at his house at first, cause neither leo or i want valuable shit breaking during some wooden-sword-fight. about an hour before we were supposed to play, thought, randy said we couldn't play at his house cause the only way he got out of mowing the lawn was by making up "I have a final exam on monday" and he lied to his mom about studying tonight.

leo (england) and brian (russia) would have made natural allies, but leo refused cause he "doesn't trust commies".

so leo volunteered his place. this turned out to be a good thing cause there were only six of us and we were going to have to play without italy, but cleo was at home and said she wanted play and was pretty confident about winning ("just cause you're dorks doesnt mean you're smart"). so we had seven players: me, leo, randy, cleo, alan and brian and some new guy also named bryan but spelled with a 'y' (he must have made that point at least four times, and i think was responsible for a war in the balkans at one point).

so we all drew from a hat and I got italy. leo got england, alan got france, randy got germany, bryan got austria-hungary, brian got russia and cleo got turkey.

near the beginning, me and bryan were allies cause alan was being a prick by building all these ships in marseilles and naming them "delenda est igor" I, II, and III, which I never really understood but it was clear it was bad. also something those guys never knew was that i had nothing to fear from turkey cause me and cleo had a secret pact.

so i attacked france (alan) for awhile, while the two brians fought in the east. france was working with germany against me and leo in england so things were pretty even for awhile. cleo was kind of sitting by herself and not gaining much ground, so i sortof felt bad for her.

cleo stalled at first

but once bryan had beaten brian, the fucker turned on me! we had a peace pact on our austria-italy border and he broke it. now, i'll admit i freaked out probably more than i should have. i think i may even have told him at one point that i hoped his mother dies of the cancer she has been fighting. i might have gone too far with that one.

but i don't feel bad about not buying him a burger. after bryan laid into me, i was crushed between him and france. after that there wasn't anything for me to do, so i went out and got a burger. it felt good to say "no" when bryan asked me to bring him back one.

the burger i ate didnt taste nearly as good as the one i denied bryan.

so after that i mostly just harassed people on "world of warcraft" using randy's laptop. at one point i got this girl from singapore to sit next to me on a bench for ten minutes cause i promised her that if she waited long enough she would see the northern lights in the sky (which dont exist in the game). i tried to cyber with her, but she wasn't into it.

i'd name cleo's ship the "s.s. lucky bitch"

oh, and somehow cleo won. she sortof just sat there for most of it and then surprised people at the end.

the bitch got REALLY lucky.